The Animal Planet Channel

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Every year, back comes the Super Bowl. It is the closest Americans get to throwing Christians to the lions in a Coliseum.

Of course, since Christians are a majority in our delightful money-worshipping theocracy, we can expurgate the violent tendencies of a beer soaked, unhealthy snack-stuffed populace by throwing two teams of highly paid professional athletes at each other.

The only alternative programming known to me in the media is the Puppy Bowl of the Animal Planet Channel.  This is sufficiently important to be covered by Variety, the bible of the entertainment industry. I have an unusually high “cutesy” tolerance, but this canine phenomenon, with its attendant spin-offs and franchises (and extended parodying of professional football) is enough to generate nausea even in me. Read more on Superbowl Every Year…

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